Contemplating or going through treatment can be a full-on process that not many people talk about or know how to support. If you think about it, most couples or people thinking of starting their families don’t announce it to the world. The first announcement comes, when they get confirmation of pregnancy or after their first trimester.

There can be a very different experience for people trying to conceive and are having difficulty or for others who know they will need assisted support to start their family.

From my experience, I felt conflicted on when and whether to tell friends and family we were starting our journey. On one hand, I didn’t want to feel completely isolated or secretive but on the other hand, I was anxious about invasive questions from family or constant check-ins. What I really wanted was to have someone who was completely independent of the situation and could be there to solely support my husband and me through the process. But when I looked into it I found that fertility doulas, particularly Queer-focused doulas weren’t, as prevalent in the UK. Having a fertility doula from the beginning of my journey would have really helped me feel more confidant, assured and supported and reduced the huge amounts of anxiety I was experiencing before the process had even begun.

This is where I felt Braw Birth could provide that fertility support for other people in the same boat. There’s no right or wrong point to seek some support. I’ve listed 10 possibilities of when and why you should consider hiring a fertility doula for that added support.

1.   When you first try to conceive or are starting your fertility journey in the coming months. 

• A fertility doula can help give you insight and the support you need to feel confident in your planning journey.

2. When you might be beginning to feel frustrated or worried after months of trying to conceive.

• I use a holistic approach and can equip you with different coping techniques to feel more assured and secure in yourself. As a fertility doula, I ensure to have evidence-based knowledge in understanding fertility and fertility tracking to help you increase your knowledge and find different approaches and techniques to boost your chances.

 

3. When you are investigating your different fertility options or possible reasons that you’re finding it hard to conceive.

• I can help to provide the emotional support you need to fully explore your options free from judgement or coercion.

 

4.   When navigating fertility treatment and systems

• I can work with you to complement and support your treatments and options.

• Knowing your treatment preferences, the processes involved, any side effects, symptoms, considerations and success rates.

 

5. When you have experienced loss or conception after loss.

• It can be a very confusing and isolating time, as your doula I can provide emotional and trauma-informed support. Working together can help to provide you with connection and understanding in your experience so you don’t have to feel like you are dealing with it alone.

 

6. When you are in the early stages of pregnancy after loss, infertility or fertility treatment.

• Research shows that people who conceive after loss, after periods of infertility or with assisted support, can have mixed emotions and feelings of fear and anxiety when then pregnant.

• As a fertility doula, I can offer consistent support in the challenging and exciting points in the early stages of your pregnancy.

 

7. When you feel your lived experience, relationship or familial structure may not be fully understood or respected in mainstream care. 

• it can feel daunting and overwhelming to access fertility support where perhaps you feel key parts of your identity, body or previous life experience maybe intentionally or unintentionally disregarded.

• As a gender and body inclusive doula, I can work with you to ensure any accessibility needs, reasonable adjustments and personal needs are brought to your medical team’s attention.

 

8. When you feel like want a better understanding and more education, guidance and resources to help you make informed decisions for your treatment plan. 

• As a doula, I work on enhancing my evidence-based education on fertility options and fertility treatments and technologies. I then work with you to ensure you are getting an unbiased education so you feel confident in the decisions you make and the treatment options you want to choose

 

9. When you don’t have a medical need for fertility support but are being categorised as ‘socially infertile’ so you need extra support in starting your family.

• single parents can have someone to walk alongside them in their journey to parenthood.

• Same-sex, LGBT or Queer couples can have a doula that understands the complexities of their situation and ensure they feel respected and supported throughout treatment

 

10. When you’ve already been accessing treatment but the experience so far feels overwhelming or too much to take on yourself. 

• A fertility doula can provide emotional support and guidance alongside your medical treatment to help you process your feelings, be there to take some of the pressures and expectations away and help you get on track to feeling assured and supported in your treatment journey.